I know that I've been absent for a while, and so I thought I should let everybody know how awesome my life is. I have discovered a time machine that has allowed me to do all of the things I've ever dreamed of. First, I went to a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, and caused a bit of trouble there.

By pure coincidence, I ran into Surf there.

Then, I came back to Earth and met some nice eccentric fellows, and convinced them that I was a god.

That was fun, but eventually they were conquered by people who didn't believe in me. Since I had caused so many wars as a god, I decided that I might like to try being in one myself. So I became a royal knight.

After that, I decided that it was about time to get a gender change. You know, just to mix things up.

Yeah, that didn't work too well. So I changed gender again.

With my new found muscles and sexy hair, I became fiercely patriotic. I decided to defend my country at any cost. I joined the army and went to Iraq.

After a while, I got promoted to a tank operator.

Eventually though, I met a guy named Tony. Between you and me, he wasn't the brightest of bulbs. Nonetheless, he gave me the idea for a new weapon.

And those are only some of the things that I've done. My travels have made me so notorious that I even got on some magazine covers.

Well that's all for now. I'll see everybody soon!

Here's a group photo, sent in by Omo, of the group in front of his Lonley Island Spawn:

Omo sent a screenshot of some debauchery in spawn:

in spawn we had wilson spawn 1,000 zombies and 1,000 pigmen. Me, kips, hockey, gold, zeeco, buck and i think pain all experienced this war....

Another Omo picture...let me let him caption this one:

Well surf....here's a nice little snapshot of me, kips, and hockey humping squids in my underwater base....

Omo just sent me an e-mail with a photo, he says it better than I can:

We all had a birthday celebration for Turkey, and here is a picture :D There's Pear, Cow, Omo, Turkey the birthday boy, Light, Kips, Hockey and Buck. If pearl sends you a picture as well, add my picture with his if you can. Thank you. Bye :D